1. |
Body
03:40
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Body
somethings following my step
i can see it moving under the reddest moon
the valley is empty the sun it isn’t rising
they move towards me my other me’s
on tight ropes in straight lines with sharp teeth and open hands
so i’ll slip under another armored sleep another night spent trudging deserts
take my body
takes a better man that’s what the cards said
takes the temperament of an more innocent person
I’m focused so god damned focused on undermining myself
and i could see the needle drop any day now
take my body
just pressed down dirt and the scent of consciousness
still lingers worried on my lips
there is no waking up from this
there is no clarity i see i see nearing my sights
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2. |
Sleep Study
04:14
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Sleep Study
what if i saw the end in a dream
and i could go back
where i was made afraid
and i could fix myself
when it was hard to heal
when i was weakest
i could take the guilt
i put my eyes on you first
you said your name and lost me
time is dragging me
and so i gave my fear a name
Juliette
what if i saw the end in a dream
and i could go back
where i was made afraid
and i could fix myself
when it was hard to heal
when i was weakest
i could take the guilt
I’m still sleeping restless
touching the moon with my eyes
i was only weak under a steadier hand
she is only the cross of what i don’t understand
its my black mask becomes my past i can cut out
be my laments and senses you can take it all in a stride
Juliette guides by my side
what if i saw the end in a dream
and i could go back
where i was made afraid
and i could fix myself
when it was hard to heal
when i was weakest
i could take the guilt
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3. |
Under The Amber Sun
03:09
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Under The Amber Sun
followed a voice down the hall to where two rivers met
the sunrise and the sunset peaked through the cracks in the cement
with our backs turned the world’s going to fall on top of us
and there will be no mistaking this
there will be no escape
i’ll finally feel real
and ill finally feel real
i’ve worn down these hands passed by at the length of less
stepped under the sun beating down amber on my back
a river will grow between us crash white walls and waves
an endless rain followed by an endless rain followed by an endless rain
i felt how small i am beneath the sky now lit up
like black and white flame burning against us
i realized I’m just some kid behind the glass of some animal’s cage
i put my hand up to it and it’ll put its there too
and i’ll stare back and it will stare back
well only a glare reveals a scratch across the glass
i am i’m separate from you
i’m separate from you i’m everything that you’re not
led like the weather led the heard
leaving drag marks behind them
like the salt build up around thirsty lips
just look at what we’ve done
you’ve gone and used your head
to cut a frame for being
set a standard
well the gift of breathing is but a price you haven’t payed
to tie off loose ends with a seamless red
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4. |
Despond
04:18
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Despond
i hate to hear myself talk new guilt still fresh on my breath
i want to feel for all I’ve done
l’ll let you fail I’ve done much worse than that
I’ve become the very thing that i once i hated
I’ve become the very thing that i once hated
i set myself up to fail
under the still moon your hands moved
i needed to lose myself in you
let’s press ourselves into a single body
i was standing in two circles tied up like ivy in your hair
raised fine breathes brushed against me all of this guilt could stain that olive skin
the fox moves under the crescent moon
as i lost myself in you
lets press ourselves into a single body
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5. |
Ugly Plans
02:49
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Ugly Plans
who do i see who do i see to heal these cuts
who do i see to heal my head
had to make another us
let it all slip through our hands
i was losing this game we play i was losing this game we play
happier alone tonight
you’re carving out another change
you want to make a better plan
you want to make a better plan
who do i see who do i see to heal these cuts
who do i see to heal my head
who do i see to heal my head
who do i see to heal my head
remember when you said you “I’m not surprised”
its always about the last time
its always about the last time i was ugly
who do i see who do i see to heal these cuts
who do i see to heal my head
who do i see to heal my head
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6. |
Guilt
03:45
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Guilt
i want to become everything to every one
violet hands reaching up towards me
but i am heavy with weakness
my faults still stones on my back
the less i act like I’m still healing wounds
i can put it in the past
i saw the hanging fox heard juliette talk
the first time i realized how far this lie could go
I’m having trouble knowing this wasn’t another dream
one where i wake up and my hands are clean
I want out of this body
i want out of this body so bad
look at what I’ve done
i still smell the smoke on my clothes
pulled down by heavy guilt
i want out of this body
i want out of this body so bad
look at what I’ve done
i still smell the smoke on my clothes
pulled down by heavy guilt
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7. |
The Fox
04:04
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The Fox
i see you’re still sitting still
smoke stale in the room
come down and touch my head
put your legs between mine
and take from my hands
then turn your teeth
show your weakness but hurting me
am i another stepping stone to you
or are you the fox following my step
i can’t see it anymore
i set the blade fall on my sword
i can’t stop this restless dreaming the scent of Juliette still hanging
the fox in its black dress its always following my step
assess this nervous nausea the smell of sage and the embounding karma
the fox in its red dress its always following my step
the fox following my step
i can’t see it anymore
i set the blade fall on my sword
i can’t stop this restless dreaming the scent of Juliette still hanging
the fox in its black dress its always following my step
assess this nervous nausea the smell of sage and the embounding karma
the fox in its red dress its always following my step
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8. |
Weak Hand
04:36
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Weak Hand
see your still setting sun
rise on oak barriers cast an “x” on the ground
where i first saw Juliette
she put her hands in my hair pulled my eyes in and said
your lies are the deepest red heavy with guilt what weighs on them is you
I want to fall onto awaiting hands to catch me when i fail
I want to lie like i always do in restless sleep
i will fail you
and i’ll try and catch you
put my arms out to touch you
waiting
I want to fall onto awaiting hands to catch me when i fail
I want to lie like i always do in restless sleep
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9. |
Olive Leaves
02:03
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Olive Leaves
everything is changing right in front of me
the less i know the better i sleep
all these cold walks home
you’re always staring at your phone
i needed your attention
i need your eyes on me
i met some new friends with uglier consciouses
they touch my skin and it doesn’t burn as bad as yours
let my body die
lay the fox in its casket
with juliette by its side
because this is what it looks like when a body dies
because this is what it looks like when a body dies
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10. |
It Became A Sea
06:37
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It Became A Sea
i was lying in the wake
i hear the undercurrent calling my name
it says you’re only on the mountain for so long
and it takes a better man than you
I’m a constant failure
I’ve made a game of this
i was following my own steps to a place i had been
it became a sea before me
but i did not wander forward only followed my path
it became a sea
my hands are shaking with fear
your eyes are pulling me closer
as i laid down my heavy arms for sleep
it looks good on me failure
i’ve been reaching for so long but you’ve finally touched it
but the crown it’ll bend you
i finally caught your sight only to meet my own glare staring back
its my hands its my hands that laid down the lure
i was better when Juliette put hers on me
it was always in my hands
i needed something to put all of my bad into
my hands are shaking with fear
your eyes are pulling me closer
as i laid down my heavy arms for sleep
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11. |
Ritual
03:14
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Ritual
you don’t want this cross it grows heavy on my back
i see your eyes move on it
this circle is fluent
time moves along and i move with it
i want to become all there is to become
i don’t care who i mislead to get there
weigh on my tired sorries
cut my hair short again
i want to feel my teeth drop into my hands
each night as i lay into another restless sleep
another restless sleep
our bodies are of failures now cut my legs again
I’ve laid down stones over reaching arms to lift me up
i’ll use your strength to set my path
the saddest is the idea that I’m still worth something
theres no time to live it all again
theres no place in heaven for me
weigh on my tired sorries
cut my hair short again
i want to feel my teeth drop into my hands
each night as i lay into another restless sleep
another restless sleep
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Our Lady Springfield, Illinois
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